Hello Everyone!
Sorry this e-mail is late, we didn't have a p-day yesterday because we were just packing and traveling the 8 hour trek to Tacloban.
I think leaving Catarman was the hardest thing I've ever done. The members were so cute! After attending the wedding of our investigators, we had a big Ward home evening on Saturday as my farewell party. It was a perfect day. I think it was one of the happiest days of my mission. It's weird. I don't feel like an American anymore. I really, truly, feel like I'm Filipino. It feels like I'm going to a foreign country again. I've just never imagined how much I would come to completely, unconditionally, love this country. I love everything about it. I'm proud of the Filipino flag. I love their language, and their traditions, and their culture, and their food, and their humor. It will always be a part of me.
Something cool that my companion noticed this week is that in any Visayan language, there isn't a word that translates into "hate." Not one. You can say, "I don't love you." or, "I don't like you," but you can't say, "I hate you." I think that's such the culture of the Philippines. They don't hate. Their doors are always open to take in people that need help. Their hearts are always open to love. And even the way they greet each other is designed to convey caring. The worst insult you could ever say to a Filipino is to tell them you don't care about them.
I've learned how to not care about money or material things here. I love how everyone is just always willing to help one another out. Not matter what. And even if a family is dirt poor, if their neighbor needs help financially, they will always give what they can. I think that's a good lesson for all of us. That was a good lesson for me.
The work this week was a perfect way to end my mission. I feel like I've done everything I was supposed to do in Catarman. I'm so grateful for the opportunity that I've had to serve there.
I went and tried to visit a certain less active family the other day. They are pretty poor, and you have to walk on a few really long pieces of bamboo to get to their house. Anyways, we got there, and sister came out to meet us. She explained to us that we couldn't come in their home because brother and his friends were drinking. We asked when we could come back, and she said she didn't know, because they are always drinking. She told us how they got baptized over 8 years ago, but then she told us a super long list of reasons why they couldn't come to church anymore. A big one being because neither of them really had a way to make money to get the money needed to take their 9 children there. As she was telling me all of this, their neighbor turned on their radio. The song, "Hotel California" was blasting. I was listening to the lyrics. "Plenty to do at the Hotel California. Such a lovely place, such a lovely place. da da da da da da but you can never leave."
I thought it was so ironic at how fitting the song related to this woman's situation. And then I realized something. I realized that that is Satan's greatest attack against us--to lure us into our own "Hotel California." Where we get distracted. Where our priorities become severely skewed. When we think our virtual reality on FB is more important than our eternal reality with our Heavenly Father. When we think that Grey's Anatomy is more important than our daily scripture feasting. I was just pondering at how sucked into a Hotel California I was before my mission. And if not anything, my mission has taught me to recognize those deadly traps.
I will forever have an appreciation for my mission. I remember being in High school and judging people that kept ALL the commandments. I remember thinking, "Wow, what a goody good Mormon. What is she trying to prove." And now I want to go back and slap myself in the face and say, "Are you serious, Sister Bingham?! She has nothing to prove. Life isn't about proving to anyone anything. The only person you should be worried about pleasing is your Father in Heaven, and you should be thankful for this girl's example."
I love this gospel with my whole soul. I love it because it helps people wake up. It helps them turn in their room keys to the pointless Hotel California’s that we've all checked our spirits into. It helps us awake from our deep testimonial hibernation, see ourselves as God sees us, and gives us the courage and motivation to fulfill our purposes in this short mortal life.
I was teaching a sweet less active recent convert whose 16, named Julietta the other day. We taught her about the plan of salvation. Halfway through, I felt prompted to ask her why she chose to come to this earth. She simply said, "I don't know sister. I can't remember. duh." Our lesson changed into just talking about the pre-mortal existence. It was a really spiritual lesson.
Do we realize that every single person on this earth, not matter who you are, CHOSE to come here? Do we realize that we actually have a deep and personal relationship with our Savior, and our Father in Heaven, but we just can't remember? Do you realize that we all went through training to come to this earth? We all fought for our agency. We fought for our opportunity to learn, and to become perfect disciples. That we were given assignments, agreed to accomplish them, and agreed to take upon ourselves the name of our Savior in the previous life as well as this one? It dawned on me that I haven't been viewing myself as someone that was chosen by my Heavenly Father, as we all are, to come and help His other children come home. When we told sister Julietta that her Father in Heaven chose her, she started crying. And now she's going to seminary again.
I hope that I can forever see people as Heavenly Father sees them. I hope I can maintain having the spirit with me always. I hope I can enjoy that companionship always. I will continue to read my scriptures every day, and uplift people, because I have learned what my purpose is on this earth.
I know that my Savior lives. I'm happy to be one of his soldiers. I'm so blessed to have been given this opportunity to learn of him, to go through some of the things (in a very small degree) of what he suffered and went through, to wear his name, to represent him, to be made an instrument, and been permitted to bring souls unto him. I'm so happy that I was given this opportunity to see this life for what it really is--to be taken away from my Hotel California, and to check out permanently.
I know that we are all children of a loving Heavenly Father, who loves us. He doesn't want us to judge one another, to fight, or to hate one another. He just wants us to learn how to love one another unconditionally. Every single one of us CAN go to the Celestial kingdom.
My capacity to love has increased so much on my mission. I hope that you all feel how much I truly and unconditionally love each and every one of you.
I love being a missionary. I'm a happy missionary. I will be proud to forever be a missionary and represent Him. I'm not perfect. By any means. But, it's okay. One day, with the help of my Savior's mercy and His atonement, I will be.
In the name of Jesus Christ, our Lord and our Savior, Amen.
Signing off for the last time,
Sister Bingham
In New York!
Waiting for Hillary
to arrive!
And she's here!
He waited!!!
A final message: Hillary, we are so proud of you! You were an exemplary missionary. You tried your hardest every day and you shared the gospel of Jesus Christ with many many people. We are so grateful for your service and the many blessings that we received as a family for your efforts. You are such a great example to your siblings and we thank you for that also. You have been converted yourself. You understand what the atonement is and what the sacrifices that Jesus Christ made for us really mean. It's hard to believe that you went so far away, for such a long time, that you had such amazing experiences, and came home safe and sound and filled with such a wonderful testimony. You served a successful mission and we know that the mission will serve you as you go throughout your life. We have a testimony of Jesus Christ and know that this is his work and that he is pleased with your sacrifice. We love you with all of our hearts.
Mom and Dad
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